Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Boyfriend Drama :(

This shit is so frustrating. I feel like I'm trying so hard but NOTHING I do is ever enough. I'm trying to let go of all these negative and hurtful things that I feel. I'm trying to see things from his perspective & consider what he's feeling & what he needs from me. It's hard though when he keeps being mean & having an attitude all the time. All cuz he totally misunderstood some shit he overheard me talking about with some guy.

& it's so unfair, after all the shit he put me through in the past.. all the lies & deceit. I always took him back & forgave and given him a million chances to make it better and change. & even though I had ALL the right to be a bitch & treat him like shit I never put him through what he's putting me through right now. He's so cold & distant. I know I hurt him but I'm trying to show him that it was a misunderstanding & that I really am sorry. It hurts to even think of him. It feels like I don't even know him or even have a boyfriend at all. I keep praying for the wisdom to know what to do, the guidance in how to handle this situation, the strength to be patient no matter how hurtful or unfair he's being.. to just put up with it for now so that I can really show him that I'm trying & that I love him & want him to be ok.

I just miss him. I hope we can get through this. I need to be strong and keep fighting for him just like he has always fought for me and our love & relationship so many times before. I'll do my best to see the man that I love in him. & not the mean, distant person that I don't even know that he's acting like right now. Please Lord, help me save my relationship <3

1 comment:

  1. girl let me start off by telling you that you shouldnt have to go through this. Last sunday at service the pastor mentioned that you should never have to defend yourself when your in the right, God will defend you. Now if you lied, cheated, etc well thats when you have nothing left but to defend yourself. So in your case, like you said it was a misunderstanding, if your bf cant get that through his head well thats his problem. Hun, you are gorgeous, your obviously smart, and you have a lot going for you, Maybe god is trying to tell you something. Maybe there is something better out there for you. I know that this isnt what you want to hear, but these things need to be said. Maybe you will take my advice maybe you wont its all up to you.

    Like the saying goes, if it was meant to be yours it always was yours and always will be, if it wasnt meant, well then you never had it.

    If your bf cant get over something like this then it wasnt meant to be. Why put yourself through this when you dont have to. I know you love him, and love makes us do the craziests things, but think about it like this, if you keep this up and you guys break up in the future. You will hate yourself for letting it go on this far. I just really hope you think about why your in this relationship, and do the pros weigh out the cons, dont blind yourself, dont be afraid to be alone. Think about yourself, and what makes you happy.

    I wish you the best and i hope you do what makes you happy.