I feel like a fugly whore!

I'm so depressed right now. I feel like such a heffa ass! I hate how I can never stay consistent with shit. I need to fucking eat better, I need to workout daily and I need to fucking keep it up! I feel so fat and fugly. I hate feeling like this. The few times I do it hits me hard cause I'm usually all in love with myself even if I'm chubby. But now I just feel way to fat and unattractive. I know I'll get over it eventually, quit whining and just do the shit I need to do so that I can be hot. But for now I just need to vent. I mean, I didn't really eat that bad this week except yesterday cause I was upset. I'm happy that I have a boyfriend who makes me feel like the most gorgeous bitch on the planet even if I'm fat and bummin it with no makeup. Ughh I hate this! I really really need to work on staying consistent with shit I need to do. One day I'm lazy, one day I feel like working out, one day I eat like there's no tomorrow. I really need to make lifelong changes with my eating habits and working out. Not just for now or for a couple months or for a week or whatever. I need to do this for myself or I'll always be a lazy fat whore. I need to workout ATLEAST 4 to 5 days a week no fucking excuses. I need to eat healthier from now on and not just for a little while. Otherwise what a waste when I gain back all the weight I've lost. I don't have a problem working out or dieting, I have a problem staying consistent. Not even just with that but with everything else in my life. I think that is my biggest flaw =/ I have to work hard to change cause I can't keep living my life this way. Ok I just needed to vent. I'll quit whining now and just workout and diet from now on. I have to let my will power and mind overcome my lazy fat body!