I miss my VSAH peoples!

The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.

Been so out of it lately.

I don’t know why I feel so out of it and kind of sad lately. Well, I think I know. Boyfriend drama. Ughh. It’s the same routine over and over. I feel myself getting drained. It’s getting harder and harder to find the energy and drive to keep fighting for this relationship. I think we really need some space from each other. Some time to ourselves so we can get our issues together and maybe learn to appreciate each other a little more. Even though I think that’s what we really need, I know we can’t do it. We’ll miss each other to much. It will be too hard to function and go about our days without each other. It’s so hard. I wish we can just resolve these issues. I just want to be happy. I’m so tired of always having to complain about the same things.

I think this is part of the reason why I’ve been having a hard time getting things done that I need to get done like working out and what not. I mean, I have been working out, I just havent been into it. I feel like a zombie and I’m literally forcing myself to finish it. But I’m proud of myself cause atleast I do it and get it done. Omg I just need to go shopping. I’ll feel so much better if I just shopped. I really want these tan Steve Madden boots and this cute Vicky Secret hoodie and sweatpants set. I need a bunch of winter clothes and thats what I’m gonna aim for on my trip to San Jose and for my bday and Christmas gifts.

On a brighter note, today actually feels like fall :) I love love love love the end of the year I can’t talk about it enough. The weather, the holidays, the clothes. Just everything. I can finally start wearing all my cute scarves, jackets and boots again. Halloween is coming and I’ve been reading a bunch of scary stories and trying to watch scary movies to get myself into the halloween spirit lol. I know I’m like a little kid but I don’t care. I love halloween. I really want to go to a theme park for halloween like fright fest or something! That would be so fun! I also can’t wait till the radio starts playing Christmas music and it starts to really get cold, when we put up our tree and decorations :) Yayy!

As soon as I come home from my trip to San Jose, I’m gonna ask all my hookups for jobs to start asking around already. I actually had an interview today but my mom decided not to let me do it cause it’s in LA and I can barely even drive around my own area. It’s too far. I really hope to be working by the time I get back. I have soo soo much stuff I want to buy. Not just for myself. I want to buy everyone Christmas gifts and I also really want my maltese teacup before this year is over, if not the beginning of next year hopefully. I also really want Steve Madden, Burberry and a Marc Jacobs handbags! lol.

Time to Make that Moneyy!

Yay my LVN licence finally came in! It’s official! I can start working as a licensed nurse! WOOTTT! Time to make that monnnayy!! I can buy all the cute boots and heels and bags I love at Steve Madden. I can buy sweats and hoodies from Vicky Secret cause they have cute bummin it outfits and I love to wear sweats all the time. I can buy all the makeup I want. Chanel and Louie bags mmmmmmm.. :) I can’t wait. I hope I find a job soon!

So happy to have my own room again!

Not such a great day.

I was so depressed today cause of all these boyfriend issues I’m having. I talked to my sister and she gave me good advice. Afterward, I went to go cuddle with my mom and talk to her about all my problems. I love her so much! She is the best ever. It’s so comforting just lying next to her, talking to her and listening to her words of wisdom and experience. She keeps me strong. Also prayer is such a strong thing. I know that GOD will get me through this and show me the way. I just have to have faith in HIM. Things will get better as they always do. I fall but I pick myself up again. In spite of everything, I really am so truly blessed and I am so grateful for all the things that I have.

I want to make everything better. I want to be better. I want to lose weight, be a better person, I want to be more positive, I want to be more patient. I just want to be the best that I can be :) Tomorrow will be a better day. A good and productive day.

Tomorrow there’s so much to be done. I have to workout and then clean my ENTIRE room. I have to do tons of laundry including my bed sheets and comforter. I am excited to rearrange my furniture and get rid of a bunch of old things and trash that’s just cluttering up my room. Today I stopped by the Goodwill and dropped off a bunch of old clothes and stuffed animals I didn’t want anymore. I’m gonna miss my sister since she’s gonna be going back to school in San Diego but I really am glad to have my own room and space back!

But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Be Strong.

Promise yourself to be strong, that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future. Give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others. Live in the faith that the whole world is on your side as long as you are true to the best that is in you.

My bffs<3

Wow

Omg I can’t believe my cousin just texted me trying to apologize and ask me to find it in my heart to forgive her. I’m totally thrown off. I don’t even know what to say or how to respond to her. I’m still really mad and hurt at what she did to me, but at the same time I’m such a softy and I feel kind of bad. I think I’ll ask my mom for her advice before I respond. What she did to me was so hurtful and humiliating, my own family. Even if I did forgive her, I don’t think it could ever be the same between us. I do miss having someone close to me that was like my older sister though.

So he still hasn’t called. I am NOT gonna call him because I was the last one to call and apologize and he just left me hanging AGAIN in all my misery. If he doesn’t want to be with me and if he thinks I’m such a bitch, then why don’t he just leave? He doesn’t even realize what he has and all the good things that I do for him all the time. What a waste of our last Friday together :(

Anyways, I’m so happy I have my BFF’s back. Jardine just completes Sol and I. I’m really excited for Sol’s 21st birthday! Relaxing at the beach, sushi dinner, and City walk. I have to fully charge my camera that night lol. Then in a couple more weeks is my trip to San Jose with my Wifeyface!! We totally need this time to get away from everything and just have some girl time. I really need to clear my mind and clear things up. Yayyy I’m excited!!

& ok now my birthday is coming up. Omg I’m gonna be 21! I feel so old! I still don’t even know what I want to do. I really feel like just going to Aroma Cafe lol. I know it doesn’t seem like much for a 21st birthday but I can’t really think of anything else I want. I want their pastries and chicken wraps! I’m also really craving red velvet crumbs cupcakes!!

1&Only!

Find me at tumblr!

I got a tumblr too now. LOL.
mfgorgeous.tumblr.com

Goals

My goals before the end of this year:
-lose weight!!
-get a job as an lvn
-move up a belt in my jedokan martial arts class
-buy a maltese teacup puppy
-go back to school for forensic science

I am so anxious to start working already! It's so hard though cause no place is hiring unless you have a year or more experience. I am really really hoping that my mom's hook up or Jardine's hookup will pull through for me. I can't wait to start working, get out of the house and make that monayy!! I am gonna get a gym membership, a maltese teacup, and I can finally pay off my loan and help my parents with the bills, and also spoil all those that I love <3
To do this week:
Wed - Workout, Finish laundry
Thurs - Workout, Clean bathroom, Fix Microsoft Word & Norton protection on my laptop
Fri - Workout, Clean up my room/rearrange furniture, Make resume
Sat - Jedokan Anniversary Potluck
Sun - Church, Lunch with the fam
Mon - Workout, Job Hunting
Tues - Sol's 21st Bday!! Venice beach in the morning, Kabuki sushi for dinner, Citywalk

I am sooo irritated with your ass right now!!!! Ughhh!!!

Fun night with my BFFs!

Looking Forward To..

I have so many things to look forward to for the end of this year!! Holiday season is almost here! I love the end of the year. So many birthdays and fun holidays and I love fall and winter season! I can't wait to be able to start wearing scarves and boots again.
Looking forward too:
Sep 8th - Glammed up with my girls
Sep 18th - Get my room back! Sister goes back to Diego!
Sep 22th - Wifey's 21st bday! @ some sushi place I forgot what it's called.
Oct 9th - San Jose trip with my BFF!!
Oct 21st - Momma's bday
Oct 31st - Halloween with my girls
Nov 30th - My 21st bday!!
Dec - Nicky comes home! Reunion with my BFFS!
Dec 25th - Christmas!
I can't wait to finally have my room back! I am gonna clean it from the floor to the ceiling, including my bathroom and I am gonna rearrange my furniture for a different feel. I can finally have my space and alone time back. MMMM I've been craving that for so long.

Do not look forward
to what might happen tomorrow.
The same everlasting Father
who cares for you today
will take care of you tomorrow.
Either HE will shield you
from suffering,
or HE will give you unfailing
strength to bear it.
Be at peace then
and put aside all anxious thoughts
and imaginations.

Money Money Money!!

I am so excited to get my license and finally start working already! I can finally make good money and help my parents out, pay off my loan, pay off my laptop, spoil my boyfriend and bffs who have been spoiling me for so long already! lol. & just too finally make my OWN money!
STUFF I WANT TO BUY/SPEND MY MONEY ON!:
-Macbook
-Maltese or Terrier teacup puppy!
-Finally a Chanel Handbag!
-Louie Vuitton handbag!
-buy my mom a new mattress
-buy baby whatever he wants
-spoil my gfs
-I can afford Christmas gifts for my family and loved ones this year!
-bigger vanity table
-new furniture for my room
-new camera
-sidekick lx 3g
-a new wardrobe!
-aldo boots!
-make up makeup makeup!
-chanel necklace
-etc..
The only thing is I'm sad I might have to work on Holidays or special occasions and I know my schedule will be all over the place and hectic! I hope I can get a morning schedule cause I plan to go back to school soon for forensic science! Woohh! I can't wait! Angie was telling me shes thinking about going into the same field! We can school it together! wooh!

Zuma Beach/Reunion

Today was the perfect summer day. It topped my entire summer. I spent the day at Zuma Beach with my BFF's Sol and Jardine, with Princess and Matt. It was soo much fun! We ate munchies, lazed around the sun, swam in the ocean next to the dolphins or sharks or whatever those things were!! hahahahaha, we took a million pics and played a night game of volleyball, then grubbed at krua thai for dinner, and chilled for a while at my pad. It was so much fun! The waves were so nice and relaxing at first, next thing I know they got so rough they almost killed me like twice! Literally! The pressure was so strong it slammed me into the ground and dragged me across the ocean floor! It threw me so hard on the sand I felt my back was almost gonna break no joke! After that I was to scared to go back in, the waves were way to strong lol. And I really wonder if those were sharks or dolphins or even whales that were swimming only like 20 feet away from us! But omg it was such an adventure! AHH!!! =)
GOD is so good to me <3 I am so happy not only that HE blessed me by making me a nurse, but for bringing Jardine back into my life. I finally feel complete again. I am soo soo sooo happy! It feels so amazing! The 3 of us together again! I don't even mind sharing her as much cuz FINALLY shes actually really trying this time. Awwwee I love Sol and Jardine!! My sisters/BFFs forever and ever!! Thank you dear LORD for blessing me with amazing friends!!

Pics from our perfect summer day!








I LOVE THEM SO MUCH! My sisters and bffs forever and ever!

Princess, Myself in pink, Jardine, and Matt way on the other side hahaha


& this is why we call him Titties. lol










Putting my face back on lol


Reunited and it feels soo good!!


Playing volleyball!